“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the result of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other’s opinion drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition.” Steve Job.


Its midweek and I am on a lunch date with someone I met a couple of weeks ago. For starter when I first met her she seemed like someone who you could actually have an intellectual conversation with. As the date progressed and we had devoured all the cherry from the cake, it was time to start partaking on the main cake and this is when I realized it would be an exciting date but not the kind of excitement I was hoping for. I quickly realized that I was dealing with someone who was tightly sealed in a box and no matter what she wasn’t going to climb out of that box; the only option I was left with was to either go with her flow or end up having the worst date. Who has time for a worst date while life is this short?


I’m driving along Langata road leaving the date venue heading home; as I was about to pass Langata cemetery for some weird reason I pull over and park the car. While driving before arriving at my current location I could not stop thinking how sad it was to go through this beautiful life sealed in a box, believing hoaxes and myths without ever having to question anything. I get out of the car and walk to the edge of the cemetery and I take a long blank stare at the graves. At this very moment my mind is going through chaos and I can’t seem to concentrate on a specific line of thought and so I continue staring for quite some time.


To alter my state of mind I decide to take a stroll at the graveyard, as I walk between the graves I kept stopping to glance at the name on the cross/tombstone and how old they were when they left us. After a couple of steps my mind seemed to settle down and now I could concentrate on a specific line of thought. As I continued to walk I came across a grave that seemed like it was done the same day since the flowers on top of the tombstone were still fresh.


 I squat so I could read the name of the tombstone; I discover that the grave belonged to a 10-year-old boy. As I stared at it I start asking myself questions. What would he have grown up to be? Would he have chatted his own course or would he have been consumed by dogma? How are his parents coping with the lost of their kid? Are they asking themselves question as to why would a sane God give them a son and take him too early before even the boys enjoys the life? Is the loss going to strengthen their marriage/relationship or break it up? What rumors will be peddled as the cause of their lost?


I get up and continue walking and staring at all those graves that were all different. Some were well kept while other seemed like their relatives were glad they left. I couldn’t stop wondering how many of those people lying here never lived, never enjoyed life, were trapped in a box, were captive of believes which they never managed to free themselves from, never got to see their dreams come to fruition, were stuck in wrong relationship in fear of what we would say about them if they left them, never came out of the closet due to phobia associated in what they were, never spoke up their mind, never confronted demons that haunted them all their life, and lastly never got a chance to express and live their lives the way they had imagined.


After spending some time in the cemetery I decided to leave and as I was driving back home I decided to give myself a good look at the mirror. Was I living the life I really wanted or had life trapped me in one of the many traps that most of us get trapped in? Now with each day I make sure I give myself a serious pat down to ensure that I am still free of life traps because at the end of the day what matters most is that I don’t just end up breathing all the oxygen while not living.




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